Legal question: Can I take out a restraining order on the dog catcher?

I've chased this bird 43,257 times. It always gets away.

Wish me luck. I'm going to bury this in the backyard today.

Meet Charlotte and Brewster, my two new friends.

Does this stuff work?

If all newspapers go digital, what will they use to housetrain me?

Some creep stole my tennis ball. I hired an expert to get it back.

Great beach read.

Check out Pottery Barn's newest couch. I can't wait to shed all over it.

Going to the moon must be so fun. Look at the holes you can dig.

A suggestion for the 2012 Olympics: Dog Frisbee.

My stomach is a bit queasy. I must have eaten a bad chair leg.

If they allowed dogs on The Supreme Court, there would be no leash law.

I spent 2 hours tonight barking at absolutely nothing.

If anyone needs a good architect, I'd recommend my guy.

I have these shoes, if anyone is looking for them:

Sorry for any inconvenience.

How come the iPhone doesn't have a hydrant locator?

Someone should be working on that.

Celebrity Sighting!

I swear I saw Lassie yesterday. I'm not kidding.

Went on a short walk yesterday. Here are all the rocks I sniffed:

My conversation with the French Poodle down the street:

Me: Hey, how's it going?

Poodle: Do you like my hair style?

Me: Want go chase a squirrel?

Poodle: Do you like my hair style?

Me: Want to run through the woods?

Poodle: Do you like my hair style?

Me: Want to chew up a priceless wedding photo album?

Poodle: Do you like my hair style?

Me: Want to leave a steaming turd on the Murphy's lawn?

Poodle: Do you like my hair style?

Me: Ok, see you later.

I watched "101 Dalmations" last night. Then I chewed up the DVD.

A picture of my new invisible fence:

Things I will beg for today:

A cheeseburger, a Fig Newton, some curly fries, a radish, and probably a few bites of pasta.

Update on the hole I'm digging. Day 2.

Big day today.

I stared at this bird for 27 minutes today.

How fast can this guy run?

Update on the hole I'm digging:

I did this in about 10 minutes.